Last poem of the Semester - Mick Jagger, Charlie Watts, Jumpin' Jack Flash, The Queen and Me
Mick Jagger Gets No Satisfaction from Clichés
(Windsor U creative writing assignment 2021)
I don’t usually go outdoors in Windsor carrying loaded heat
It came in handy savin’ Mick as he was getting mugged in the street
Gotta reveal that Mr. Jagger ain’t no Street Fighting Man
But, as I sewed him up I knew I was still a huge huge fan.
“Sorry ‘bout the Sticky Fingers; Just Let It Bleed my mate.”
“Start Me Up. Gotta make tonight’s Cobo concert date”
“I won’t be your Beast of Burden this night of painful ‘fun’
“Next time in Windsor I’ll tell ya what really needs to be done!”
Let’s Spend the Night Together. No, I am not his date.
Gee Jack, my pal. Looks like Mick Jagger is arriving late.
And listen Jumping Jack, he will demand that you jiggle
So limber up and be ready to jump up high and wiggle.
He said something ‘bout painting this door red, Jack
No F-ing way, Jagger and I are going to Paint It Black!
Or maybe we will just sit and roll these Tumbling Dice
Time Is On My Side, winning his money would be nice.
Almost time to chow down, I said, as we waited for Mick’s knock
Could hear his vintage Rolls Royce roaring down the block.
Mick never eats salad, he says Rolling Stones gather no moss
Chunky Goats’ Head Soup, for sure; I will break out dental floss.
Suddenly the door opens. Mick saunters into my room.
“Gimme Some Shelter and for my Honky Tonk Women too!”
“Wild Horses Won’t Keep Me Away” sings big lips Mick
“Dance, Little Sister, Dance, and damn well make it quick.”
I Ain’t Too Proud to Beg for a fast dirty twirl
He is a great hoofer, but I wished he was a girl.
”You Can’t Always Get What You Want,” I sigh,
Dream he is Lady Gaga as I grab his tiny thigh.
“Listen Stephen it’s a bit of a Zinger”
“I need a biggie” states the famous singer.
“Charlie Watts Got Off His Cloud back in the summer
He is on the wrong side of the sod now and that’s a bummer.”
Mick and Charlie (r)
Jagger told me Watts had been secretly buried in Dieppe Garden
And that the Queen commanded Mick to deliver a medal and a pardon.
I know I was about to Play With Fire for Liz
I guess it is all part of the Rock N Roll biz.
“She’s Shattered. Wanted to present while he still banged a snare.”
I took the OBE medal box and asked Why me? Mick don’t you care?
“Suspicious press are always staked out near the grave site.
Can you plant it there for me, the Queen and Charlie tonight?”
I left the house and returned covered in sod and dirt,
Mick and the Rolls were gone, and I was feeling hurt.
I told Jack I’d dug up Watts and maybe it was dumb
When no one was looking I put the medal Under His Thumb.